Oops

Dear Blog,

I forgot our two year anniversary. Sorry about that! It's been a great couple of years.

Happy belated bloggiversary.

Love,
Jane

Food, etc.

I (finally) watched Food, Inc. last night. I wasn't as disturbed as some of my friends by the semi-graphic images of the conditions in which most animals are raised/slaughtered (I saw a lot of that when we watched Diet for a New America in 9th grade), but I did find the movie super depressing.

My thoughts:

1. People are so concerned about health care becoming "Socialized"; why is no one freaking out about the food industry? Huge farm subsidies, monopolies that pretty much eliminate competition, no true free market..? Did I miss something in high school government class?
2. "Food libel" is a felony in some states? You can lose your right to vote because you were found guilty of "slandering" a food producer? For serious? Libel should be a civil matter, not criminal. Apparently, free speech mostly only extends to weirdo hate groups.
3. I quit eating soy and soy by-products because it's a migraine trigger for me. It's amazing how much food has soy in it - I hope it doesn't become the new corn; if so, I'm screwed.
4. Wow, what a depressing movie.
   

/End of rant

***

Achilles' sleep schedule is slowly driving me crazy. He naps after work, and then goes to bed at 2 or 3 in the morning.

***

I have been incredibly grouchy for the past couple of days.

***

The previous two things could be related.

***

Listening to Greek language CD's in my car has had an unintended consequence: I'm no longer tempted to talk on the phone (or worse, text) while driving. The language CD's work better for me than books on tape or music because they're more interactive. Maybe I'll try another language after our trip.

I probably just need a nap

Things that make me grouchy on Monday mornings (a partial list):

1. birds
2. responsibilities
3. alarm clocks
4. the sun
5. people who get up early and go to the gym
6. people who don't need coffee
7. people who already drank a lot of coffee and now want to talk to me
8. political discussion
9. lowest common denominator radio deejays
   
10. allergies
    

Just say "Ohi"

I've been listening to some Greek language CDs ever since we booked our honeymoon. I have to say, I'm a bit concerned with the direction the lessons have been taking in the past few days.

It starts out innocently enough. A man sees a young woman on the bus. He asks her if she speaks English. She says no. He says he speaks a little Greek. She says he speaks very well. They bid each other adieu.

In the next lesson, they bump into each other again. The man tells the woman he's American, not Greek. (To which I say, well, duh. She probably guessed he wasn't Greek when he couldn't speak Greek when they met on the bus.) She says she's Greek, not American. He asks her how she is. She tells him she's fine, thanks. Then she sees a friend and rather abruptly ends the conversation to go talk to him. The lesson doesn't get into it, but I get the feeling that the American man is rather miffed.

Things began to get really troubling by about the fourth lesson. At first, the man simply seems to be asking the woman directions to Victory Street (which is over there) from Sophocles Street (which is over here). However, I think the man and woman must end up walking to Victory Street together, because suddenly, Victory Street is over here and Sophocles Street is over there. The woman mentions that she's thirsty, and would like to drink something. The man emphatically says that *he* is not thirsty, he's hungry. This time, he is the one who abruptly ends the conversation and walks away.

Apparently Greek women find the hard-to-get man as intriguing as my American friends do, because by the time they bump into each other again in the next lesson, she's inviting the American man for drinks. "Where would you like to drink?" she asks. "Your place," he replies. "My place?" she asks. "When?" "Yes, your place," he replies. "Now."

Now, I don't want to sound like my mother, but I really don't think this woman should be inviting a man she hardly knows over to her place for drinks. Coffee could be fine, or perhaps they could go to a restaurant for a beer. I could be wrong, but I get the feeling the American man only has one thing on his mind. Plus, who's to say he's not just a total creeper? I mean, how often have you met normal people on the bus? I'm hoping the Greek woman comes back to her senses by the next lesson.

***

In other news, I think I may need a new hobby.

I did order a camera (thanks for the encouragement!) and have started making a packing list. Does anyone have any book/TV recommendations? I need to be prepared; the in-flight movie on the way back from Puerto Rico was "Marley & Me," and I ended up ugly crying almost the entire way home.

Headaches

Today's random thoughts:

I want an iPhone. But I've been with my cell phone company for 9 years, which is like 50 years in people years. I can't just end our relationship because some tarty young phone decides to flaunt itself in front of me.

***

Even though I'm over my cold, I have been waking up with horrendous sinus headaches every morning for the past week. I've tried so many things - more pillows to raise my head, nightly neti pot use, Sudafed - nothing seems to help. I even read (on the Internets, of course) that standing on your head can help. As counterintuitive as that sounded, I was desperate enough to try it. I ended up dizzy, with a worse headache than I started with.

***

I tend to be a person who shops a lot before I go on vacation. I am trying to avoid this before we go to Greece. These are the things I feel that I "need" (but probably don't).

• New digital point-and-shoot camera. I have a camera that's several years old, but the lens cap doesn't always open all the way anymore. You can't tell there's a problem when you take the pictures - you just end up with a lot of blurry photos. The thing is, I could have probably send it to be repaired, if I hadn't waited until the last minute. Also, I could just share Achilles' camera. It has a date stamp setting that can't be turned off, though, which drives me crazy.
• A larger carry on bag. I really want one of those convertible backpack type suitcases. I hate checking bags. I could probably use a gym bag or something, though, and get by just fine. I'm actually pretty good at packing light.
• A step down voltage converter. I'm sort of afraid of these, but the last time I was in Europe, my rechargeable items all died in the first few days. Do these work? Do they fry your electronics?
• New clothes/purse/shoes. There's not really anything wrong with what I have; I really just haven't bought any new spring or summer clothes (and didn't buy new winter clothes either, for that matter), and am kind of bored with my current stuff.
• Miscellaneous things to keep me entertained/comfortable while traveling. Books, magazines, episodes of 30 Rock, fancy sleep mask/ear plugs sets. I could normally get most of these things for free (or not need them at all) at home. (I feel guilty taking library books out of town, like I'm breaking some sort of law or something.)

Any advice?

The opposite of the plague

First, thank you SO MUCH for your sweet comments on my stand up video. I was super nervous about posting it, but the Internets has been so amazingly sweet.

I haven't been posting much this week because I've been sick. I told Facebook I had the plague, thinking that was vague enough not to be an overshare. However, my jerk friends immediately replied "GROSS!" and suggested that I was covered in boils and blains. So I had to clarify that I have a somewhat persistent cold.

This is why I should keep my mouth shut and follow my rules for posting status updates on Facebook: don't post anything unless it's 1.) short, 2.) specific, 3.) something the people on my friends list actually want/need to hear about.

source

Oh well. Other than the disease and pestilence minor cold, things have been going rather well. In fact, I got a blog award from one of the sunshines of my blogging life.

You should check out Aura's list of bloggers she awarded - there are some fantastic writers I've already been reading for a while, and others that I definitely plan to check out.

As for me, I've been meaning to do a series of posts featuring some of my favorite blogs, but I haven't quite gotten my brain back together enough to do it yet. Here are some of my favorites that I definitely recommend you check out:

Aura (obvs.)
Kim - I sort of feel like she's a BFF even though we've never met in real life. Amazing writer.
Rachel - ditto re: BFF status. Also an amazing writer.
Juliet - Amazing writer. Lives in France. What more can you ask?
Katelin - Adorable in so many ways. Love her.
miss petite america - Sweet, bubbly, funny, ambitious. I'd love to meet her someday.
Suzanne - another BFF blogger I've been reading forever. Old 97's fan. Makes me want to visit Cleveland, which is something I never would have expected to say.
Shannon (and Shan&Mike) - wonderful, honest writer (who also gets told she should be a funeral director when she takes career aptitude tests).
SavingDiva - A blog friend who became a real life friend, SD's blog keeps me thinking about my budget.
Georgia - quickly becoming famous. Already fabulous in too many ways to count.
Hillary - Lives in Vancouver with two of the cutest puppies I've ever seen. I want her to be my best friend.
Bekah - Has an adorable new baby. Super sweet.
LosingIt - She's sassy, speaks her mind, and I'm pretty sure I could call her if I ever needed to cut a brake line.
LittleMsBlogger - She's currently being tormented by a mockingbird. I love her Rants & Raves.
LiLu - She's kind of a big deal. Her TMI Thursdays (now retired) bravely share where no one has shared before.
TudorCity Girl - An honest, wonderful writer. I'm actually kind of glad I don't know her in real life, though, because she likes to play April Fools jokes, and I am super gullible.
My sister - She writes mostly about my niece and nephew, who are adorable. (Yes, I realize I'm biased.)
Sleepy Jane - Another old bloggy BFF who I'm dying to meet in real life. She has two adorable dachshunds and lives in South Africa.
Mermanda - Keeps me entertained on Twitter. Has an adorable retired greyhound.
Ashley - A wonderful, honest writer. I feel so lucky that the Internets allows me to connect with people like her.
Polly - Apparently I have a weakness for Francophiles. I love reading her posts about her life in France and her return to the U.S.
the texpat - I secretly want the texpat to move back to Texas so that we can be best friends. However, I love reading about her life in Germany, so I guess it's OK if she stays there. :)
Her - A wonderful blog and real life friend. She's a wonderful writer. Has two dachshunds. She's anonymous, so I won't say too much, but I adore her.
ANG* - Awesome. Recently lost 15 lbs, which is amazing. Has one of the cutest dachshund puppies ever.
Isabel - Another fellow Old 97's fan. Isabel lives in Seattle and just found out she's expecting a baby boy. Congratulations!
Vanessa and Kyle - Fellow Texans Vanessa and Kyle have a fascinating blog discussing their experiences teaching English in Korea.
Lemon Gloria - Hilarious, honest... Sometimes when I'm bored I just start reading her archives.
Ben - Adorable, hilarious, fabulous. Has two dachshunds. He lives in Nova Scotia (which is gorgeous, and also where DistractibleGrandfather was from).
The Culebra blog - We visited this tiny island when we went to Puerto Rico. I loved it.
MrsNoTouching - Her blog would be awesome enough if it was only pictures of her adorable daughter. However, she's also one of the funniest writers on the whole Internets.
C - Has been a little quiet lately, but I love her blog. She makes all sorts of crafty and delicious-sounding things.
BCSmithereens - BC is a new reader. I've really enjoyed reading her archives.
Captain Pork Chops - a wonderful photographer. Reading her posts is sort of like reading little love letters.
angelasw - She's in one of those in-between/waiting periods of life that can be so frustrating to live through, but she's handling everything with patience.
Katie - I love the title of her blog, La Petite Chic. (I am definitely not petitely chic myself.) She and her husband take an annual trip to the Caribbean, which makes me insanely jealous.
eemusings - She's a personal finance blogger (in Kiwi!), but she's recently started blogging more and more about her life. I love her blog - it's fascinating and informative.
kimberly michelle - She blogs about all sorts of things, but I particularly love her posts about the things she makes.
Rachel Not Rebecca - She's also in one of those frustrating in-between times in life. I love her blog.
Nicole - Not always safe for work, but hilarious.
Rassles - She is awesome. Someone recently stole her bike. Clearly, people who steal bikes from awesome people are NOT awesome themselves.
LR - She's from Toronto and is always posting hilarious videos. She has great book recommendations.
your wishcake - Very honest, very artistic.
The Dainty Squid - Love her awesome hair, her tattoos, her thrift store and flea market finds.
Kyla Roma - Somehow, I only recently found her blog. She's super honest and awesome and has adorable hair.
Dustin - Dustin is my friend in real life. We even live in the same neighborhood. He recently started a project in which he gets rid of one thing every day. Reading the archives is sort of like a less creepy version of peeking through someone's Goodwill donation pile.
Melanie - Wedding photographer extraordinaire!! Melanie is one of the nicest people you will ever meet. If you need a photographer, I can't recommend her enough.
Crystal - I'm currently reading her archives. She's fantastic - she has a cute dog, she's Canadian, she lives in France...
Deidre - Anyone who orders black beans by the case is awesome in my book.

Wow. This was exhausting. Also, interesting. Apparently, I gravitate toward bloggers who are 1.) dachshund owners, 2.) Texans, 3.) Canadians, 4.) Francophones/Francophiles, 5.) Old 97's fans, 6.) people with ridiculously adorable kids, 7.) easily distracted, 8.) into making pretty or delicious things, or 9.) several of the above. Yes, I probably read too many blogs. I can't help it - I really love the Internets.

I probably missed a lot of people (not even including the ones that haven't been updating lately and the giant bloggers that are too big to know I exist and who won't notice that they weren't listed here anyway). I'm sorry about that. I will try to include anyone I forgot in a future post.

I hope I don't regret this...

As promised, my performance at Cap City Comedy Club from March 29th. There were about 200 or 250 people in the audience. The performers were a mix of professional comics, amateurs, and first-timers. This was my first performance ever.



[Note: those of you who have not been reading my blog for a while may not know that my name is not really Jane, it's Sandra. I'm not anonymous on this blog per se, but I try to stay semi-anonymous as far as Google searches go.]

Double click, double standard

This is probably sort of a non sequitor after my earlier post about being more positive, but have you seen the recent PSAs about online safety?

-Click- That's the sound of your classmate forwarding a picture from your profile to everyone he knows. -Click- Some guys posting graphic comments about your body -Click- and worst of all your dad seeing a photo of you topless all because of the time you posted those pictures on your profile. Anything you post online, anyone can see; family, friends and even not so friendly people. Visit CyberTipLine.com. Brought to you by the US Department of Justice, the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and the Ad Counsel.

source

I think I understand what this public service campaign is trying to accomplish: they want girls (everyone, really, but girls especially) to be safe about what words and images they post online. I think that's a good goal. I even understand why most of the messages are directed at teen/tween girls; I've seen To Catch a Predator - teen girls are probably the most common target of online perverts and criminals.

What I don't agree with is the other message this ad campaign seems to be sending: "You girls need to be careful about how you come across online, because once everyone thinks you're a slut, you're ruined forever."

Does a young woman's sexual reputation have to be the main focus of these ads? Why not her academic/professional reputation? Why not focus more on the actual real, physical dangers of talking to strangers online?

Even worse is this statement: "That's the sound of your classmate forwarding a picture from your profile to everyone he knows. Some guys posting graphic comments about your body..." Newsflash: teenage boys are going to talk about teenage girls bodies regardless of anything a girl does or does not post on the internet. Blaming the victim for being a target of bullying? NOT COOL, AD COUNCIL.

So, what could possibly work better than couching an important message in sexist rhetoric? Try being honest, direct, and to-the-point. Half-baked emotional appeals to young girls need not enter the picture.

Teenagers can smell B.S. a mile away. The less of that you use in your ads, the better.

Spring has sprung!

One of my main goals in life is to try to have a positive outlook. This goes against my natural tendency to always see - or at the very least, anticipate - the worst in a situation.

For the past couple of weeks, though, I've been having a much easier time seeing the bright side of life. Maybe it's newlywed bliss. At any rate, these are the things that are currently making me almost (dare I say it?) giddy:

• Austin has an oldies station again. We haven't had one for about a decade. I'm ridiculously excited - I was raised on a musical diet of oldies and oldies country. My time spent dancing in my car has increased by at least 417% in the past week. (The only downside is that the station seems to consider Debbie Gibson and Prince "oldies." Don't get me wrong; I love 80's music as much as the next girl, but c'mon. I was alive in the 80's. I'm not old enough to be an oldie yet, am I?)
• The weather has been fantastic. On top of that, it's a banner season for wildflowers in Texas. There are blue skies and flowers everywhere you look. The grass is green, the birds are singing... I feel like I've stumbled into a Disney cartoon. Take a look at these pictures of my niece and nephew in the bluebonnets. ADORABLE!
• As I mentioned yesterday, we booked our honeymoon. There's not much in life I enjoy as much as I enjoy vacation planning. The fact that Achilles and I are both art history buffs and we're going to Greece makes the planning even more fun.
• It's Friday! I don't work this weekend! I have no wedding or comedy performance to plan! Tonight, a few friends and I are hanging out by the pool and barbecuing. Achilles and I are also going to hang out with two of our best friends from childhood/high school - one who just got engaged (congrats David!) and one who's in town from San Francisco with her husband (who, incidentally, is one of the most laid-back people I've ever met). I'm hoping for lots of trivia, board games, and silly conversation.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend Internets!

Misc

• We booked our honeymoon last night: three nights in Athens, four nights in Santorini, and one night spent in London to avoid sleeping in an airport. We're excited, although traveling abroad always feels sort of surreal. Is that true for everyone, or just Achilles and me (since neither of us ever went on overseas vacations as kids)?
• There is a ridiculous amount of pollen in the air in Austin right now. When the wind blows, you can see clouds of grass and tree pollen blowing in the air. Bailey's coat even turns green when we take him outside. It's a shame, because the weather is fantastic right now.
• I still haven't gotten my video of the comedy class performance. I emailed the teacher once to ask about it, but he never replied. Should I email him again? How many times can I email him without seeming psychotic? He did cash my check...
• The temperature dropped 15 degrees last night, which puts a damper on the outdoor barbecue we're attending tomorrow evening. The weather should still be fairly warm (65-70F/18-21C), but I doubt anyone will want to swim. However, condsidering that it will soon be at least 30 degrees hotter outside, I'm not complaining.
• Is there anything new with you? I feel like the Internets has been quiet lately, but perhaps you're all just enjoying the spring (or fall!) weather. (Or getting married!)

More craftiness

My very dear friend Lyndee did an absolutely amazing job helping with Achilles' and my wedding. I knew I wanted to do something special to thank her. This is what I came up with:

1/2 egg carton, tissue paper, butterfly sticker, bluebirds of happiness (Lyndee had mentioned that she really wished she had a couple of those birds on a shelf at her house), ribbon

Lyndee opened the carton to reveal this:


cascarones with puns. Originally, I was going to dye the eggs, but I decided that I liked the natural shades. I glued little messages to the front: "You're egg-ceptional!" "You're the coolest chick we know!" "You crack us up!" "You ova-did yourself!" "Standing ova-tion!" and "Sunny side up!"


Four of the eggs had Reeces pieces inside. The other two had awesome jewelry from Etsy:


Peony ring from The Family Jewels

Carved blue birdy necklace from FreshlyFig

I was inspired by Not Martha's Easter Surprise Eggs, and used her instructions for sterilizing the eggs. Lyndee herself inspired the jewelry - she surprised me with peonies at the wedding, she was the one who encouraged me to make the little bird cake toppers, and she was the person who made the little bird fingerprint tree.

Lyndee was pleased with her thank you gift.

Gone to the dogs

When I made my little cake topper birds, I remembered how much I enjoy making critters out of modeling clay. Here are my latest creations.







I'm wondering how I should paint them, and whether or not I should make a mommy dog to go with the dad and pup. Thoughts?

I'm also horribly afraid our condo will soon be overrun by tiny animals.