Thursday, December 4, 2008


I got a "Happy Birthday" text from an unknown number on my birthday. It turned out to be from M.

M and I only went out a couple of times. After our second date, when he told me about his drug use, I told M that we couldn't have a relationship but that I would be there for him if he ever wanted to talk. He did end up calling a couple of times over several months, mostly to tell me his side of stories that usually started with him making some really bad choices. He never asked for anything from me but a few minutes of sympathy, so I would listen, and suggest that he get help. The last time I heard from M several years ago, he said he was moving to another town to live with his grandparents. I later heard that he had actually been arrested.

It was surreal to hear from M after so long. Of course, I am glad to know that he's OK, but in a way, it makes me sad to know that someone who was so capable of caring about other people didn't think he deserved to take care of himself.


tal said...

wow. thats so sad. at least you were there for him...i think its often the most senstive people who turn to drugs because the world just can seem so harsh. its such an awful cycle.

Anonymous said...

How sad! I have a friend with a similar problem - well ok its the same problem!!! He calls me when he is drunk/high and then loves me - the rest of the time he doesnt knwow me!

Anonymous said...

reminds me a lot of one of my uncles. it is hard to care for someone who doesn't care about themselves. the most you can do is support them when they need it. it hurts so much to see them relapse, get arrested or be on drugs generally, and there is really nothing you can do but protect yourself. good luck - if it is someone who is close to you like this, it could go on for years.

Jane said...

tal, harrassedmom, tex - Thanks for your comments. It really is sad. It's easy to care about a caring, sensitive person, but so frustrating because you can't make someone decide to like himself.