Why, of all the possible places in the world for my psycho stalker crazy ex to find work, did he get a job here? We dated for around a year, but he followed my movements like a creepy (but somewhat incompetent) federal agent for five years after I broke up with him. I know I work for a big employer, Universe, and that it's a small world, but we didn't even work in the same industry.
Sigh. I thought he had gotten married and moved out of state, but he wasn't wearing a ring. He was definitely still giving off that I-wanna-know-your-every-move vibe. Could you please make sure we don't run into each other very often, Universe? I know you've got my back.